54 SECONDS LEFT TO IN REGULATION TIME:
SCORE USC 21 POOR LITTLE BRUINS 7.
"TIME OUT" SHOUTS GUTTSY LITTLE UCLA COACH NEUHEISAL(?), "TIME OUT", WE WANT THE BALL BACK".
"OK", WE'LL GIVE YOU THE BALL", USC COACH CARROLL SAYS.
NEXT PLAY: BAM. SLAM , 50 YARD USC PASS : TOUCHDOWN: SCORE USC 28- FUCLA 7.
"YOU WANT THE BALL, HERE'S THE BALL D-BAGS." "STICK IT WHERE THE SUN DOESN'T SHINE".
"HEY, THAT'S NOT FAIR", CRY THE GUTTSY LIL' BRUINS. "YOU ARE NOT PLAYING FAIR", CRY THE UPPITY LITTLE CRY BABIES. "YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO TAKE A KNEE!!!" "PILING IT ON", "RUNNING UP THE SCORE", " IT'S NOT FAIR, IT'S NOT FAIR".
WAAAH, WAAAH, WAAAAH. "LET'S FIGHT, WE'RE SO MAAAAD"; WAAAH, WAAAHH, CRY THE LITTLE TEDDIES FROM WESTWOOD.
USC plays in the ghetto. Sportsmanship, shortsmanship, you wanna play with us, we are gonna mess wit you, fool. USC'S coach is in the PROJECTS in South Central at mid night in a 1985 Corrolla with the Bangers, talking it up with the BROS.
I see BABY BEAR COACH in a Westwood donut shop ordering CROISSANTS and talking all YUPPIE crap to the Westside "intellectuals" with their double parked PRIUSES; acting all cool and preppie and snobby, and P.C., and looking down their book smart, fat assed noses at the rest of us peons.
"We won't forget this," blabber the POWDER BABY BLUES.
TROJANS DON'T GET EVEN, we just keep beating the crap out of you year in and year out. This season is a bit of a disappointment. How many teams would love to be 8-3 right now? Notre Dame? Fat ass Weisal(?) is about to be canned, along with his $40 MILLION. HOW MANY MORE YEARS ARE THEY GOING TO GIVE NEUHEISAL(?), one, two? How many more excuses are we going to hear? Poor UCLA: "no recruits, no depth, no talent, last coach screwed us (personally, I thought Coach Dorrel was a good coach and decent human being)".
EXCUSES, EXCUSES. MAN-UP GUTSY BRUINS. YOU STINK AND ALWAYS WILL. OCCASIONALLY YOU MIGHT GET LUCKY AND FLUKE OUT A WIN AGAINST US TROJANS, BUT:
LOS ANGELES ALWAYS WAS AND ALWAYS WILL BE:
TROJAN TOWN!!!!!
DON'T EVER FORGET IT!!!!!!!!
Sunday, November 29, 2009
Sunday, November 15, 2009
HELP ME, I'M TRAPPED IN BIZZARRO WORLD!!!!!
Up is down, cold is hot, night is day, turkey loaf (yeeeech, uuuugh, aaaaagggghhhh)is meat loaf , water is beer (not a bad thing!), Stanford plays smash ball football, USC plays pattycake!!!! I've been transported by evil alien beings to the mothership. I've been filled and drilled, electro shocked, and LSD drugged. The universe is convulsing. "No Beat" Pete is getting creamed. My heroic boys in cardinal and gold are zombie retrofits. Human shells filled with green and oozing crud. Lifeless relics simulating Trojan footballers. Get me out of this terrible hallucination.
Alien demons scheming to conquer our universe. Perverse, horrible creatures salivating at the demise of our very existence. These creatures want to EAT us!!!!!
Help me, help me escape this nightmare. STANFORD 55--- usc 21. The scoreboard screamed at me. STAAAANNNFOOOOORRRRD 55-55-5555555555. aaaaghhh, THE DEMONS KNOW MY WEAKNESS. HOW COULD THEY KNOW I HATE THE STANFORD "TREES" (formerly Indians, but with P.C. they just had to change) WITH A PASSION? Stanford, arrogant, spiteful, smarter than ever body else, wimpy ass, nerd wanna Be's (Cal Tech has the nerd title of USA), playing smash ball and winning against the mighty Trojan warriors of USC. Put me in the straight jacket, padded cell now. The aliens won.
Life used to be so simple. Easy rules of life: Day of home USC game: 1). Tailgate 2). Drink beer or equivalent (not white wine, which is for wimps) 3). go to game and gloat after one sided USC victory. Uncomplicated, easy, expected, win in November, win at home . Now, Day of home game: 1). assemble nervously for tailgate, most people arrive later now because of lost interest, they only come to see winners 2). Slug down a couple of wimpy ass mamosas 3) go to game, leave empty stadium humiliated after game because fair weather fans give up and leave after Trojans are down by seven(7). 4). get wised ass messages from smirking anit-USC "friends" who went to second rate schools 5). Next day read pessimistic articles about the fall of Trojans in liberal assed Sunday L.A.. Times.
Pete, please get me out of this night mare. I don't do out of body experiences very well. I'm not comfortable. I don't do losing very good at all. My psyche needs to be placated with winning and not whining. I need to be able to eat my pre-game burgers and dogs knowing that when I enter that hallowed place, the Coliseum, the MIGHTY TROJANS will take the sacred field and pummel their lowly opponents into submission. It should be the valiant warriors of USC going for two (2) after running up the score 48-0, and not some cocky loser from Palo Alto.
Pete, send these posers back to Netherland. Regain our sovereignty over outclassed, lowlife invaders seeking to steal our thunder. Once again make us proud. Thump your chest and resume your place as KING OF THE JUNGLE!!!!
WAKE ME UP!!!! WAKE ME UP!!!!
Alien demons scheming to conquer our universe. Perverse, horrible creatures salivating at the demise of our very existence. These creatures want to EAT us!!!!!
Help me, help me escape this nightmare. STANFORD 55--- usc 21. The scoreboard screamed at me. STAAAANNNFOOOOORRRRD 55-55-5555555555. aaaaghhh, THE DEMONS KNOW MY WEAKNESS. HOW COULD THEY KNOW I HATE THE STANFORD "TREES" (formerly Indians, but with P.C. they just had to change) WITH A PASSION? Stanford, arrogant, spiteful, smarter than ever body else, wimpy ass, nerd wanna Be's (Cal Tech has the nerd title of USA), playing smash ball and winning against the mighty Trojan warriors of USC. Put me in the straight jacket, padded cell now. The aliens won.
Life used to be so simple. Easy rules of life: Day of home USC game: 1). Tailgate 2). Drink beer or equivalent (not white wine, which is for wimps) 3). go to game and gloat after one sided USC victory. Uncomplicated, easy, expected, win in November, win at home . Now, Day of home game: 1). assemble nervously for tailgate, most people arrive later now because of lost interest, they only come to see winners 2). Slug down a couple of wimpy ass mamosas 3) go to game, leave empty stadium humiliated after game because fair weather fans give up and leave after Trojans are down by seven(7). 4). get wised ass messages from smirking anit-USC "friends" who went to second rate schools 5). Next day read pessimistic articles about the fall of Trojans in liberal assed Sunday L.A.. Times.
Pete, please get me out of this night mare. I don't do out of body experiences very well. I'm not comfortable. I don't do losing very good at all. My psyche needs to be placated with winning and not whining. I need to be able to eat my pre-game burgers and dogs knowing that when I enter that hallowed place, the Coliseum, the MIGHTY TROJANS will take the sacred field and pummel their lowly opponents into submission. It should be the valiant warriors of USC going for two (2) after running up the score 48-0, and not some cocky loser from Palo Alto.
Pete, send these posers back to Netherland. Regain our sovereignty over outclassed, lowlife invaders seeking to steal our thunder. Once again make us proud. Thump your chest and resume your place as KING OF THE JUNGLE!!!!
WAKE ME UP!!!! WAKE ME UP!!!!
Thursday, November 5, 2009
CABLE ME FREE!!!! WIRELESS BE ME!!!
FREEDOM!!! FREEDOM!!! FREEDOM CRIES IN AMERICA!!! CABLE BE FREE!!! COMPUTER BE ME!!!
Oh powerful router of mine. Loose me from my bondage chains and cubicle reins. Ungrip me from the wires' noose and let me roam my beautiful terrain. Surfing and roaming the univerise of unfeterred electronic seas and electrical highways from living room couch to bedroom slouch. I am FREE, FREE. No longer having to win the race to the little, smelly, information dungeon shared with three ungrateful felines and one "super" achieving real estate agent, I can take my own information box to whichever domicile I chose. I can, now, search and hunt from my dining room table or write and scribe from under the roof's gable. From ocean view porch or rear balcony with torch, I can be my own master and at my own pace. I can be the manipulator of the binary system, conqueror of the 0's and 1's, at my will, at my discretion.
TODAY IS EMMANCIPATION DAY. ADAM THE GENIUS OF ALL THINGS ELECTRONIC HAS RELEASED ME FROM CHAINS TO THE WALL SOCKET. ALL HAIL ADAM!!!! My powerful, code encrypted router was installed today, giving me the ability to have my own space. In fact, I am typing this from the comfort of my recliner. How far I've come in such a short time. Two weeks ago, I was living on a camping chair and having to compete for a computer with my daughter, Stephen, and my wife Sancy. Now, I can print and e-mail from anywhere I chose and not have to share. Not sharing is what I do best.
Sancy is happy because : no cables. Stephen is happy because she doesn't live with us anymore.
The cats are happy because they can use the litter box anytime and smell the joint up and not have to listen to me throwing up because of their putrid, gagging , ass smell.
Things could'nt be finer with me in my recliner.
Gotta go. I'm going to print something from here to there. No wires, kind of amazing, huh?
Oh powerful router of mine. Loose me from my bondage chains and cubicle reins. Ungrip me from the wires' noose and let me roam my beautiful terrain. Surfing and roaming the univerise of unfeterred electronic seas and electrical highways from living room couch to bedroom slouch. I am FREE, FREE. No longer having to win the race to the little, smelly, information dungeon shared with three ungrateful felines and one "super" achieving real estate agent, I can take my own information box to whichever domicile I chose. I can, now, search and hunt from my dining room table or write and scribe from under the roof's gable. From ocean view porch or rear balcony with torch, I can be my own master and at my own pace. I can be the manipulator of the binary system, conqueror of the 0's and 1's, at my will, at my discretion.
TODAY IS EMMANCIPATION DAY. ADAM THE GENIUS OF ALL THINGS ELECTRONIC HAS RELEASED ME FROM CHAINS TO THE WALL SOCKET. ALL HAIL ADAM!!!! My powerful, code encrypted router was installed today, giving me the ability to have my own space. In fact, I am typing this from the comfort of my recliner. How far I've come in such a short time. Two weeks ago, I was living on a camping chair and having to compete for a computer with my daughter, Stephen, and my wife Sancy. Now, I can print and e-mail from anywhere I chose and not have to share. Not sharing is what I do best.
Sancy is happy because : no cables. Stephen is happy because she doesn't live with us anymore.
The cats are happy because they can use the litter box anytime and smell the joint up and not have to listen to me throwing up because of their putrid, gagging , ass smell.
Things could'nt be finer with me in my recliner.
Gotta go. I'm going to print something from here to there. No wires, kind of amazing, huh?
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